'I don't have to pretend anymore'

Steve Baxter talks about living with depression.

I was diagnosed with depression ten years ago – but I had been struggling with it since childhood. 

I felt there was something inadequate about me – that everyone else was able to cope and it was just me who wasn’t able to live his life in the right way. The shame this brought meant I found it hard to talk about how I was feeling to those closest to me, let alone act. 

Eventually I saw a GP who understood I was going through depression. Prescribed antidepressants, I began to feel more able to cope with the everyday strains, and learn the difference between ‘feeling low’ and the more serious chronic depression in my life. 

I’ve found huge support from writing about depression – from other people who are depressed and because I don’t have to pretend anymore. 

Sometimes if you admit you’re vulnerable it can be the strongest thing you can do.

This article reflects the experience of the individual. It is not health information from the Men's Health Forum under the terms of the NHS England Information Standard.